100 Things

Because I am both unoriginal and bored at work. Enjoy:

1. I'm a blond haired, blue eyed Jew named Mary. People have a really hard time with this. But the name comes from my paternal great-grandmother, Mary Katz Cohen. Her father was a Rabbi. Besides, technically, Mary was Jewish.
2. I actually converted to Judaism when I was 18 with my mother. You know, to make it official. "In case you ever want to marry an Orthodox Jew." Right.
3. School was never very hard for me. Except BC Calculus. That shit nearly killed me.
4. My memory is a little ridiculous. I get it from my father. You can play a song I haven't heard in ten years, and if I knew the words then, I still do. I think it's why I was so good at languages.
5. Probably as a result of my memory, I am an excellent speller. I read a lot as a kid, and if I've ever seen it I can look at it and tell if it's spelled correctly. Most of the time I can even correct it if it's misspelled.
6. I am a corrector. This annoys a lot of people, especially my very best friend. I try not to do it, but sometimes it just slips out. It's not my fault I'm smarter than you. (KIDDING!)
7. I'm also an interrupter. Although I like to think I've gotten a lot better about this one. It requires a concentrated effort though :p.
8. When I'm drunk, I cannot shut up. I probably talk too much even when I'm sober, but it's about 100x worse when I'm drinking. And I know I'm doing it...in my head I'm thinking "Shut up, Mary. Nobody cares." But I just keep talking.
9. I refer to myself as a serial monogamist. I have been known, on rare occasions, to date casually, but mostly I'm That Girl Who Always Has a Boyfriend. I like being a girlfriend, what can I say?
10. My favorite color is purple. If it is available in purple, I will almost definitely buy it in purple. However, I hate purple-flavored things. They all taste like cough syrup. That shit's gross.
11. I am a cat person. I can tolerate dogs on an individual basis, as long as they don't 1) jump on me, 2) stick their wet nose in my crotch and/or 3) lick me.
12. I never drank in high school. I didn't really drink in college. Including a semester abroad in Spain. Andalucia, to be exact. Party central. Yeah, I'm not sure how I did that either. Don't worry though, I'm making up for lost time.
13. I have a half-sister who is 13 years older than I am and a brother who is 18 months younger. I have nothing in common with either one of them except some DNA, supposedly.
14. I never thought I would be an aunt. My sister never wanted kids and my brother...well, God help any children he may have. And then my sister got pregnant at 36 (on purpose!) and now I have a niece, Macy Gwen.
15. I worked for 13 years taking care of other people's children. I was a better parent to most of them than their own parents will ever be. And yet, I'm sure I'm going to do all the stupid things they did that annoyed the crap out of me when I have my own kids.
16. I don't like politics. I know I should care, and I do, but I hate following it and I don't know enough about most things to be able to make a valid argument. I do vote though, so don't yell at me.
17. I never watch the news. Again, I know I should, but it just angers/depresses me. I'm still young enough to get away with being relatively clueless.
18. Speaking of depression, it runs in my family like whoa. And we're not just talking a little bit of the blues here. We're talking full-on, certifiable crazy. My 6 months of therapy last year consisted mostly of my therapist going "It's amazing how functional you are after the stuff you grew up with." Amen, sister.
19. I get bored with my hairstyles very easily. I always want to cut it off about 6 months after I decide to grow it out. And I almost always hate it when I do. So I've started dying it sometimes to stave off the scissors. I'm currently Medium Dark Brown.
20. I like being good at stuff and surpassing/defying people's expectations of me. I think part of my appeal is that, when you get to know me, I'm not what you expected when you first met me.
21. I get along way better with guys than with girls. I do not do shopping/fashion/catty bullshit. I prefer sports/beer/stupid jokes. As a result, most of my friends are guys.
22. Girlfriends/wives always hate me when they first meet me. I'm told this is because "if you were a dog it would be ok. But you're hot, so they freak out." If you say so. They usually end up liking me once they get to know me.
23. I hate being hit on. With a fiery passion. Fortunately, when you're the only girl with 5 guys at a bar, that doesn't happen very often. BONUS: You also don't have to pay for very many drinks.
24. Despite the fact that I hate being hit on in bars, I met my last two boyfriends in bars. The first one because I worked there and he was a regular. The current one because he tagged along with his brother, who's a friend of mine. But he didn't hit on me!
25. I am a Diet Coke addict. I consume scary amounts of it. Cancer amounts. But it's so good...
26. I will eat pretty much any vegetable but straight steamed spinach. I will eat spinach in quiche though.
27. I am terrible about taking pictures. I always have my camera but I never freakin' use it. As a result, I am a picture-stealer. All the best pictures of me were taken by someone else's camera :p.
28. Numbers and I do not get along. I skip them, transpose them, miscalculate them. It's bad. I frequently look like an idiot because of it.
29. My favorite dessert has been and will always be Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla ice cream. I'm never moving anywhere they don't sell it, so don't ask me to.
30. Speaking of moving, I would be perfectly happy to live in Texas for the rest of my life. I like it here. Except for the 100+ degree days. I could do without those.
31. I am a huge freaking wuss when it comes to cold. I'm that person in the office with her space heater on even though it's 70 degress outside. I am easily over air-conditioned. But I'm a hot sleeper...it's pretty much the only time I'm not freezing my ass off.
32. Despite being a hot sleeper, I am a bedtime cuddler. It hurts my feelings if you roll away from me when we turn the lights out. You shouldn't be offended, however, when I roll away from you in the middle of the night because we're both sweating our asses off :p.
33. I have what some might consider a disturbing affinity for children's movies. Especially Pixar movies. And The Emperor's New Groove. Don't judge me.
34. I love the TV show Friends. I can't pick a favorite friend, they all have their moments. I can also quote half of most of the episodes. But I don't, no worries. At least, not anymore.
35. I cry in almost every movie I watch. Sometimes it's happy crying, but I do it just the same. Maybe because I'm not so good at expressing my emotions in real life? I don't know.
36. Speaking of disturbing affinities and crying, I had a nice long cry at the end of the seventh Harry Potter book. Mostly because I was sad it was over. And happy for Harry and Ginny and Ron and Hermione.
37. I have several celebrity girl crushes: Jennifer Aniston, Tea Leoni and Carrie Underwood to name a few. I would totally tap that.
38. I didn't ride roller coasters til I was 16. I spent the whole time we were in line saying "there is no f*ing way you are getting me on that thing." And then I rode it and survived and now I'll ride pretty much anything.
39. I am extremely clumsy/accident prone and I bruise like a peach. It's sometimes speculated that I'm abused due to all the bruises. Like when I broke my arm in kindergarten and they asked me "if my mommy hit me." Nope, I did this to myself. Thanks for your concern though.
40. I truly believe in "mind over matter." I'm not sure exactly when it happened, but I hit a point in my life where I decided I was done not doing things because I was scared. Life's a lot more fun when you can just suck it up every once in a while and try new things.
41. I can handle almost any bug, no problem. I cannot handle cockroaches. I literally hyperventilate when I have to kill them. And then I have another whole episode when I have to pick them up and throw them out. I'm freaking out right now just thinking about it.
42. I am a Daddy's Little Princess. Despite the fact that our relationship is not always sunshine and roses, I am well aware of the fact that he does not often tell me no.
43. I'm really anal about doing things in order. Like TV shows...I can't start watching halfway through. This is why TV on DVD/DVR is so awesome. I can be OCD and still enjoy all the shows everyone starts talking about midway through Season 3.
44. I hate horror movies. I do not enjoy spending 2 hours freaking out about when the next scary thing is going to happen.
45. While not a horror movie, Jurassic Park was the only movie I've ever had to leave the theater in the middle of. I could not tell you why it so thoroughly scared the shit out of me. Maybe because I was like 10? My sixth grade boyfriend (who was there at the time) made me go back and watch "just the scary parts" 2 years later and I was fine.
46. I startle easily. I can know that you are standing around that corner waiting to jump out at me or that you're going to try and tap my shoulder and make me jump on your way back from the bathroom, but you will still get me every. freaking. time.
47. Unnecessarily mean people really irritate me. If you don't have anything nice to say, keep your damn mouth shut.
48. I am built like my mother and have long, skinny everything. My ring size is a 4.5 and my inseam is 35 inches. I found a picture of my mom when she was 22 and you could paste my face on it and never know the difference.
49. My feet are also long and skinny. And narrow. And did I mention long? My dad used to tease me "just think of how tall you'd be if they didn't turn so much down for feet." My dad, he's a funny guy.
50. I have no desire to be any taller. 5'6" is tall for a Jewish girl. And I like wearing my sexy red high heels.
51. I love to bowl. In high school, I had my own ball. I still have my own shoes. It's twice as much fun when I get to beat a guy's score. I don't go nearly as often as I'd like to anymore.
52. I play adult kickball. And while I'm relatively decent at the kickball part, I am usually pure ownage at the flip cup part. Now there's a marketable skill...
53. Many people I know have gotten/are getting married. I am simultaneously jealous and relieved that I am not one of them. I want a wedding, but I am SO not ready to be married yet.
54. The most important people in my life are survivors...people who have lived things no one should have to. I have plenty of friends this doesn't apply to, but the ones I truly love are the ones who are as broken as I am and still get up and live every day as best they can.
55. Conversely, I cannot stand people who sit around and bitch about their "problems" while making no effort to change their situation. I will not sit and listen to you bitch about how fat you are while you suck down that milkshake. I will, however, be more than happy to hear about how sore your abs are because you did the ab class last night.
56. I'm not the kind of person who fakes relationships. If I don't value your friendship, I'm not going to try and maintain it. If you pitch a hissy fit about something you never told me bothered you, odds are we're done. Some people are only meant to be a part of your life for a little while. I'm ok with that.
57. I am TERRIBLE about keeping in touch with people. Truly awful. Phone calls, letters, emails. It makes me hate myself a little bit. It's also probably why the people I've been friends with the longest are the ones I can pick right back up with like it hasn't been 6 months since we last spoke :p.
58. I grew up on snow skis in Vail, CO, but I haven't been skiing since I was in high school. Despite many years of experience and the skill to do so, I have never skied a black run. Back to that whole I-don't-enjoy-being-scared-shitless thing.
59. I had never been to a beach until I was 17. I love the beach. I want to get married on the beach. If you can make it, great. If not, I'll see you when we get back.
60. I love to sing, but not by myself in front of people. I miss choir like crazy. I loved the validation of my talent paired with the anonymity of not knowing which voice was mine.
61. I am a lyrics whore. John Mayer is my favorite songwriter. Sara Bareilles is also awesome. Well-written music truly moves me.
62. I cannot dance. I'm sorry, but my knees cannot take me that near the floor. Sometimes, when I'm drunk, I think I can though. I prefer to dance with girlfriends over boyfriends 100% of the time. Think Lady Gaga's "Just Dance" meets Pink's "U + Ur Hand."
63. My dad and I have the same initials. He got mad when I "stole" his email address of firstintiallastname@whatever.com. Sorry dude, you named me!
64. I've had Gmail since you had to be invited. Google is the shit.
65. "Republicans" bother me because I think they're hypocrites. Fiscally, they want you to stay the hell out of their business, but socially they want to legislate all kinds of stuff that's none of their damn business.
66. My mother is from Arkansas and says things like "caddywhompus" and "six of one, seven of the other." The first times I said these things, people looked at me like I was nuts.
67. I like checking things off lists. Maybe a little too much.
68. I am notorious for having to move my furniture around every 6 months or so. It's amazing what I woman can lift/move when she sets her mind to it. I once moved a queen-size bed down a flight of stairs and into a U-Haul by myself.
69. Speaking of queen-size beds, I once inflated a queen-size air mattress without a pump. I have a ridiculous lung capacity (probably because I was a singer). I did get kinda dizzy though.
70. I love citrus scented things. Best ever is the Satsuma body wash at The Body Shop. Orgasm in a bottle.
71. I am almost incapable of using an entire bottle of shampoo before switching to a different one. I have no idea why this is. It drives my mother nuts. I'm pretty sure she's still hanging on to half-used bottles of stuff I bought in junior high.
72. My favorite pair of jeans is from Walmart. My second favorite pair of jeans is from Old Navy. I cannot spend exorbitant amounts of money on clothing. I just don't care that much.
73. I was in college before I knew what a hair straightener was and I'm still learning the finer points of applying make up. As in, how to apply eyeliner without looking like a raccoon. Did I mention I don't care that much?
74. Despite my lack of attention to my appearance the majority of the time, I like to think I clean up pretty well.
75. When I was a little girl, my mom used to have to sew skirts onto my favorite tshirts to get me to wear dresses. Now I love to wear them. They're so easy and they show off my looooong legs.
76. I was uber-involved in youth group when I was in high school. I've been to Temple maybe 10 times since I graduated. But I still consider myself a faithful person and know that I can always good back when/if I need/want to.
77. I've agreed to teach religious school to 8th graders in the fall. Comparative Religion. I'm still not sure how I got talked into this. Probably because I have a really hard time saying no.
78. I wanted to be a teacher from when I was in elementary school until my third semester of student-teaching in college. I was prepared for the problems the students bring. I was not prepared for the complete lack of support from the school administration/government.
79. I love strawberry-flavored anything. Candy, cheesecake, ice cream, soda. On second thought, make that strawberry-flavored things that are awful for you.
80. I have been at my current job longer than any other job I've had since I graduated college. It's been 6.5 months.
81. I could eat Whataburger every day for a month and not get tired of it. Whataburger taquitos might be the best thing ever. And my god, the ketchup...they call that shit "fancy ketchup" for a reason. One more reason I can never leave Texas.
82. I love college football. Do yourself a favor and do not get me started on the whole Texas-OU-Tech fiasco caused by the BCS tie-breaker last year. We won head to head. What. the. fuck.
83. I also grew up going to Dallas Mavericks games. Back when they were truly awful. You know, when Jason Kidd was originally a Maverick. My dad's best friend from college was the arena announcer until Cuban bought the team. Dirk Nowitzki is a badass.
84. That best friend who was the arena announcer? He used to scare the shit out of me. His voice was loud and deep and he always smelled like scotch and cigars.
85. When I came home from college after my freshman year of college, I swore that was the last time I would ever live in my parents' house again. This is my second time living at home since then (though the last one was *very* short-lived).
86. I've lived with three boyfriends, two of them only for the summer, the third for a year. Well, most of a year. I broke up with him two months before the lease ended :p.
87. The only place I've ever lived by myself was a 385 square-foot efficiency in a not-so-savory part of Austin. The bathroom was so small you had to lift the toilet seat to close the door. No lie.
88. I don't really eat cooked fish. I do eat shrimp (Reform Judaism people, look it up). And sometimes sushi, but mostly I like the stuff that doesn't actually have any fish in it. I'm weird, I don't know what to tell you.
89. I am a gadget/technology freak. I always want the latest and greatest toys, especially by Apple. I totally get this from my father. I'm on my 3rd Mac computer and I own 2 iPods and an iPhone. It's like a drug.
90. I have two giant couches, a washer and dryer all sitting in storage right now. None of which are paid off yet. Damn you 0% interest for 12/24 months.
91. Did I mention I haven't always been too good with money? This is how you end up in your parents' house at 24 years old. Credit cards are the devil.
92. I had what I refer to as my "quarter-life crisis" at the end of my junior year of college and consequently tumped my life on it's end. It was the best thing I ever did for myself.
93. While my family is often about as impossible to deal with as they come, they're still my family and they always will be. The hard part is finding the place between enabling and loving them anyway.
94. I have totaled two cars and wrecked another one and walked away from all three wrecks with a few cuts and bruises. Some of them weren't even my fault. My father refuses to have anything to do with buying me a car after the two that I totaled malfunctioned and nearly killed me.
95. When I read anymore, it's usually crappy chick lit. When I find an author I like, I usually read everything they've written. It's that whole doing things in order and checking them off lists thing :p.
96. I wish I was crafty, but I so am not. This results in lots of projects I start but don't finish. Like knitting. And scrap booking. And sewing...you get the picture. I was always jealous of those girls in school who could do those stupid bubble letters so perfectly.
97. I've traveled to Spain, France, Italy and Israel. Two pieces of advice: buy a backpack and half the number of cities you're planning to visit. Trains are twice as taxing as actual sight-seeing.
98. My second toes are longer than my first ones. And I have hitchhikers thumbs.
99. My favorite place to be, ever, is cuddled up with someone I care about watching movies and making love during thunderstorms. You know, like in fairy tales.
100. My mom says I've always been an old soul and I get younger every year. At 24, I feel like I'm just starting to get a handle on "being a twenty-something." I'm loving every minute of it.